Dew Spinner
Well-Known Member
Someone looked up the OP on Elvenstats and said there was no tournament activity for 9 weeks, that's quite awhile.
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Your Elvenar Team
Kicked out of my fellowship and feeling hurt
- Thread starter Aradia NightStar
- Start date
Darielle
Chef, Scroll-Keeper, and Buddy Fan Club Member
I'm sorry that happened to you. The fellowship should have asked you if you were okay and if you needed a couple weeks to get together.
I hate removing members from the fellowship for inactivity, because I always wonder what happened. We adopted a policy of 30 days of inactivity without a message telling us why results in removal. It was particularly unpleasant when I sent several messages over the course of 30 days to a founding member of our group. She was never the most active but she was always there, and we felt she was our anchor because she had been there longer than anyone, including me. But after three messages and ignoring my own rule of 30 days, on day 35 I removed her and sent a message saying that if we have space, we would welcome her back.
She wrote to me two weeks after that (so about 6-7 weeks after she stopped playing) telling me that she had computer and personal problems, and she was furious with me. It felt terrible, but there was no spot for her by then.
Right now I have someone who was going in for cancer surgery in early January ... that message was from December 18. Nothing since then; we're hoping he's okay. I just sent him a message recently that even though we have a rule saying removal after 30 days, we've decided to extend him for another month, until Feb 18. If I hadn't heard from him on the surgery, though, it probably would have been 30 days. Another member just had a death in the family. We're giving him extra time too. Fellowships must always balance the fact that they owe their teams the chance to get more points and to preserve their high-value members, who may just leave if they see the fellowship floundering without a full crew. But humanity and empathy is always important, too.
Sometimes there's just nothing you can do. But I agree that no messages asking what happened was cruel, and they should have cared enough about you to ask. As everyone said, there are always new fellowships that would love to have you. Consider this an opportunity rather than a problem. Research fellowships on elvenstats and make sure you check out the fellowship's overview in game so that you can see if they have any rules, such as (removed after 7 days of no activity). I've seen fellowships with rules as little as 3 days!
Good luck on your search. You may use this as an opportunity to find the perfect fellowship for you!
ajqtrz
Chef - loquacious Old Dog
I'm so reluctant to remove members that I keep them for months and months, only to find my "inactives" had grown to almost a third of my roster. Not good, so I cleaned house. And that hurt. If I had been more proactive I would have removed them sooner and probably been a more appealing fellowship for others to join. What's the "right" amount of time? Without any contact re RL, I'm now looking at 30 days. With contact I'll keep my members (active or not) so long as I get a message every 4-6 weeks. In other words, RL sometimes sucks, but you don't have to add insult to injury if they are around enough to send a msg once a month.
Anyway, hope you find a new (and great) fellowship. We've got lots of openings, if you are in Khelonar.
AJ
Anyway, hope you find a new (and great) fellowship. We've got lots of openings, if you are in Khelonar.
AJ
SoggyShorts
Mathematician par Excellence
See that just seems unreasonable to me. In our FS we get a message every couple of months from a different player letting us know that they'll be away for a while, and sometimes when it's major they'll remove themselves rather than leave us all hanging. I totally respect that.
Obviously, I don't expect anyone to log in and give us a heads-up from the ambulance,
but
I simply don't understand how someone can be so serious about the game that they are "furious with you for removing them" after almost 2 months of silence but not be serious enough to log in for 2 minutes at any point during those 2 months.
If you don't care about your 24 friends enough to let them know what's up for 2 straight months but expect them to hang on to your spot, that seems like a pretty one-sided friendship to me...
free-spirit
Well-Known Member
We rarely have anyone go awol, but we recently had to remove a member that had not checked in for two months. They went from being a regularly active player to nothing overnight. It was very concerning. We did send several messages, though and asked them to let us know if they started playing again. I wonder if old messages disappear after a certain time, and they sent you some, but they're gone now?
Dew Spinner
Well-Known Member
I believe when you leave a FS the FS messages are gone from view because the "all FS members" box is checked and you are no longer a FS Member. But, that doesn't apply to one on one messages.
free-spirit
Well-Known Member
Yeah, I wasn't sure. Old messages in my mailbox just disappear, but it could be quantity and not age since I have a lot of them.
Dew Spinner
Well-Known Member
I have a message in my mailbox that is just shy of 3 months old.
free-spirit
Well-Known Member
Must be quantity then. My oldest is from Dec. 1. I guess I talk too much, lol
Chimaera1234
Member
In my FS we YEARN for our teammates to return and are truly concerned when we don't hear from them. We also wait multiple weeks before removal...but that is something we must eventually do. How long SHOULD an FS wait before removing a member with zero activity? Another angle - how long should a core member be COMPLETELY inactive, not even to jump in to say "the s*** hit then fan in my life, then the roomba spread it all over the carpet, will be back when I can be"? Seems like it take about 3 minutes to enter game, type message, go back to life disaster.
If a core member in good standing had to go MIA, then came back, I know my group would do everything we could to welcome them on return.
If a core member in good standing had to go MIA, then came back, I know my group would do everything we could to welcome them on return.
Henroo
Oh Wise One
We are not a gold spire fellowship. We are solidly silver with periodic pushes for gold. You are entirely correct that if the goal of a fellowship is Gold Spire than it probably needs to be more strict about player activity because gold spire is just so hard to achieve without use of the spire perk. We still easily make 10+ chests in tournament and silver in the spire even if a member is inactive. So it does not hurt us to give a missing member extra time. Although as you also point out, it is always much appreciated if a member who has something going on in RL communicates.5+ weeks of zero contact before action is taken?
We have had no problem with players having reduced (or even zero) activity for weeks (or even longer)
BUT
a single message letting us know you haven't deleted the app forever goes a long way. Over the years we've had a couple of players go silent with zero notice and they simply never logged in again. Everyone else has always sent a message. We're a pretty close group and communicate regularly.
In a non-Gold spire FS I could see it, but to get gold for the diamonds requires 22 members, and with the standard 1-2 players who have RL issues and 1-2 players who are new and learning it's just way too close to also reserve a spot for someone who is AWOL for over a month.
It would just be so unfair to take away the diamonds from the other 20+ members who are present.
mucksterme
Oh Wise One
Deleted User - 849411552
Guest
@Aradia NightStar - I agree, this response from the person who booted you was over the top. They should have at least sent you a message to inquire if you were OK. You are obviously very committed to the game and I think you would be an asset to almost any fellowship. I'm sorry this happened to you.
If you were on Sinya Arda I would invite you to join us right away, but unfortunately for us you are not.
If you were on Sinya Arda I would invite you to join us right away, but unfortunately for us you are not.
Dominionofgod
Thinker of Ideas
putting the personal issue aside for a moment.. it almost sounds like a luxury. Weve had one member that left the game many many many months ago. A long time, good player. But shes still in the fs after all this time because its that damn hard to get good recruits. Even being a laid back 10 chest fs. - For that reason alone it feel odd to boot someone after only a couple weeks..
Dominionofgod
Thinker of Ideas
i think they do dissapear after a certian amount of time. I kept a few messages over the years jsut to use as a reminder for something. But then they were suddenly gone. And i usually only have, at most, 2 maybe 3 pages of message threads. (One full page for kp swaps). But i noticed things jsut vanishing as well.
SoggyShorts
Mathematician par Excellence
Recruiting is indeed very difficult, and this might be OK for an as-advertised "laid back" FS, but seeing 1 let alone 2 inactive tags in a FS would be a huge red flag for me if I was FS hunting.
Dominionofgod
Thinker of Ideas
catch 22-circlar issue. Inactives happen. Fact of life. And one of ours had to leave the game for RL issues. - But its hard to get ppl to replace them. And if you cant, the inactive start piling up over time. Thus looking bad and discouraging ppl from wanting to join that fs. So you need ppl to get ppl. Horrible circle there.
Worth noting tho, that we are still a weekly 10 chest fs and do all events.
US5 The Builders, check us out ppl! lol
Henroo
Oh Wise One
It is a balancing act. I am in fellowships that fall under the competent but relaxed tag. We are solid 10 chest/silver spire. As already discussed upthread, I tend to give members more time than a hardcore gold spire fellowship would. However I also try to keep black marks on Elvenstats to 2 or under. For the simple reason that other people also look at elvenstats. And I think if you have 3 or more players marked as inactive, it increases the chances of other fellowships contacting your remaining active members with regards to recruiting. It is rare for other fellowships to to try to recruit from a fellowship that looks strong. But if you look weak, you open yourself up to having your members contacted by other fellowships.
SoggyShorts
Mathematician par Excellence
Interesting, I see it as a snowball rolling downhill:
Having inactive members makes you less attractive which leads to fewer active members and the problem continues to get worse
vs
Removing inactives makes you attractive, gain members
Also, as @Henroo mentioned having some active players and some dead cities makes you look ripe for poaching
"Hey I've noticed you get 5,000 in the tournament and you are in a FS with several players who get zero and have gone inactive... would you be interested in a FS that more closely matches your level of play?"
If filling your FS is an issue (as it is for most FS) then there's really no downside to booting inactives. If they ever come back, you'll probably have a spot open. A few nicely worded messages before the kick and there shouldn't be any hard feelings.