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    Your Elvenar Team

Kicked out of my fellowship and feeling hurt

I’ve been playing Elvenar for a long time - it’s actually the first video game I have ever played! I have spent most of the several years in the same fellowship and have been a very active and supportive member. That is, until three weeks ago when my work life went into hyperdrive and my personal life fell apart, in part because of all the overtime I was pulling. I know I should have changed my city name to indicate I would be out for a bit when I logged in at the end of the holidays, but I didn’t realize that things were not going to improve. I finally got back on the game after 2.5 or 3 weeks, only to find out I’ve been kicked out of my fellowship. I know it’s silly, but I’m feeling hurt. I’ve been a core member for YEARS, it just really sucks to be removed without any inquiry or anything (just a message that I was removed, no messages asking if I am ok or where I’ve been). It’s just a game, I know, but it feels crappy to have spent several years playing alongside folks, chatting about life, providing advice and support, only to be dumped after a couple weeks of silence.
 

Dew Spinner

Well-Known Member
I’ve been playing Elvenar for a long time - it’s actually the first video game I have ever played! I have spent most of the several years in the same fellowship and have been a very active and supportive member. That is, until three weeks ago when my work life went into hyperdrive and my personal life fell apart, in part because of all the overtime I was pulling. I know I should have changed my city name to indicate I would be out for a bit when I logged in at the end of the holidays, but I didn’t realize that things were not going to improve. I finally got back on the game after 2.5 or 3 weeks, only to find out I’ve been kicked out of my fellowship. I know it’s silly, but I’m feeling hurt. I’ve been a core member for YEARS, it just really sucks to be removed without any inquiry or anything (just a message that I was removed, no messages asking if I am ok or where I’ve been). It’s just a game, I know, but it feels crappy to have spent several years playing alongside folks, chatting about life, providing advice and support, only to be dumped after a couple weeks of silence.
Unfortunately, FSs have to maintain "active" players to achieve goals and to retain other FS members. If I am in a FS with Inactive members and nothing is done about it, I will probably look for a new FS and the FS will be out of an active member. I know it sucks but it is a part of the game, maybe you could message your old AM and explain what happened and get back in.
 
I responded to the messages telling me I have been kicked out. And I do understand removing members when they go MIA, and wanting to remain competitive, it’s just… I have been one of the core members for several years. Higher ranking, above average activity, very friendly and welcoming on chat and in messages. If there had been a message after a week or two asking if I planned to come back to the game, and then another message a week or two later letting me know they were removing me to make room for new/active members, then I might feel differently. But the fellowship removed me and just to have an empty spot in their ranks. And just a message saying I’ve been removed, no comments or concern or anything. I know I’m being overly sensitive but these are people I’ve been chatting with for years. And things are really rough for me right now. Just feeling hurt.

Edited to add that this is the first time I have ever been gone from the game for more than a week. I have consistently been active and reliable for years.
 

StarLoad

Well-Known Member
My personal opinion is that too many people forget this is a game, and as such R/L comes first. I know from experience how life can get in the way and without warning. 2 weeks is not very long and would just get me worried about a missing player. That would generate a message asking if they were ok and such , not a boot.

Ed
 

Dew Spinner

Well-Known Member
I responded to the messages telling me I have been kicked out. And I do understand removing members when they go MIA, and wanting to remain competitive, it’s just… I have been one of the core members for several years. Higher ranking, above average activity, very friendly and welcoming on chat and in messages. If there had been a message after a week or two asking if I planned to come back to the game, and then another message a week or two later letting me know they were removing me to make room for new/active members, then I might feel differently. But the fellowship removed me and just to have an empty spot in their ranks. And just a message saying I’ve been removed, no comments or concern or anything. I know I’m being overly sensitive but these are people I’ve been chatting with for years. And things are really rough for me right now. Just feeling hurt.
Maybe they did you a favor in disguise, now you can look for a FS that values you more.
 

Yavimaya

Scroll-Keeper
I responded to the messages telling me I have been kicked out. And I do understand removing members when they go MIA, and wanting to remain competitive, it’s just… I have been one of the core members for several years. Higher ranking, above average activity, very friendly and welcoming on chat and in messages. If there had been a message after a week or two asking if I planned to come back to the game, and then another message a week or two later letting me know they were removing me to make room for new/active members, then I might feel differently. But the fellowship removed me and just to have an empty spot in their ranks. And just a message saying I’ve been removed, no comments or concern or anything. I know I’m being overly sensitive but these are people I’ve been chatting with for years. And things are really rough for me right now. Just feeling hurt.

Edited to add that this is the first time I have ever been gone from the game for more than a week. I have consistently been active and reliable for years.
So you responded and they still have not offered you your spot back?!!! Sounds like I would rather be in a different fs if I were you. Our members where I'm at check in with each other and accomodate when real life happens. I'm sorry this happened to you! I would be hurt by this as well.
 

quin629

Well-Known Member
So sorry you had real life issues & I'm sure you will find a new group of friends. But perceptions can be different for different people. If this is your account on Fely, it looks like your FS booted you after 9 weeks of 0 tournament activity. You may not have realized it was that long or have felt that there was otherwise sufficient communication, but I can also understand an AM thinking that 9 weeks was plenty of grace time, and they did obviously have a replacement waiting. Everybody's perceptions are different.
 

StarLoad

Well-Known Member
So sorry you had real life issues & I'm sure you will find a new group of friends. But perceptions can be different for different people. If this is your account on Fely, it looks like your FS booted you after 9 weeks of 0 tournament activity. You may not have realized it was that long or have felt that there was otherwise sufficient communication, but I can also understand an AM thinking that 9 weeks was plenty of grace time, and they did obviously have a replacement waiting. Everybody's perceptions are different.
Dont count on Elvenstats to be that accurate, it seems to have been missing a lot of data, and I have seen where a player tagged as inactive not get tracked as well as active ones

Ed
 

Dew Spinner

Well-Known Member
Dont count on Elvenstats to be that accurate, it seems to have been missing a lot of data, and I have seen where a player tagged as inactive not get tracked as well as active ones

Ed
I believe the OP stated that they didn't contact the AM or Mages about their RL issues, so I think that there are issues on both sides of this. As far as I have ever seen Elvenstats might miss a week here or there but never several weeks in a row.
 

mucksterme

Oh Wise One
Unfortunately, FSs have to maintain "active" players to achieve goals and to retain other FS members. If I am in a FS with Inactive members and nothing is done about it, I will probably look for a new FS and the FS will be out of an active member. I know it sucks but it is a part of the game, maybe you could message your old AM and explain what happened and get back in.

My FS is top ten on Fely. We've been Gold Spire and 10+ Tourney forever.
We are generally top five in FA
This is all in saying we achieve goals and would be more understanding to the OP, especiallt to a long time member.
 

SoggyShorts

Mathematician par Excellence
A few weeks is not much. My minimum is a full month of inactivity. After that, I send a "are you still playing?" message to them and wait another week for a response. And if they have been a long term, good member of the fellowship I will often wait more than a month before messaging them.
5+ weeks of zero contact before action is taken? :oops:

We have had no problem with players having reduced (or even zero) activity for weeks (or even longer)
BUT
a single message letting us know you haven't deleted the app forever goes a long way. Over the years we've had a couple of players go silent with zero notice and they simply never logged in again. Everyone else has always sent a message. We're a pretty close group and communicate regularly.

In a non-Gold spire FS I could see it, but to get gold for the diamonds requires 22 members, and with the standard 1-2 players who have RL issues and 1-2 players who are new and learning it's just way too close to also reserve a spot for someone who is AWOL for over a month.

It would just be so unfair to take away the diamonds from the other 20+ members who are present.


That said, @Aradia NightStar when you did return you should have come back to see an inbox with multiple messages of concern, and perhaps a couple of forum PMs too, especially after years of playing together.
 

Deleted User - 1759441

Guest
you need to, "NOT", allow some no live people to have this much control over you. Find one without such a tightly wound leader. To kick someone after 3 weeks is not normal. Look in the mirror and respect That Person and quit letting people that have no real concern for you weigh so heavy on you. This game gives you nothing real. it after all, is simply a browser game. People get lost in other games, you know, Real Games that you buy and download? not these free browser games that are wrapped up in everything to trick you into pulling out your credit card? if you was in a FL that was drinking the kool aid so much to kick members for 2-3 weeks off, especially during holidays. Look the gift horse in the mouth and APPRECIATE your new freedom.
 

Mirai

Active Member
I responded to the messages telling me I have been kicked out. And I do understand removing members when they go MIA, and wanting to remain competitive, it’s just… I have been one of the core members for several years. Higher ranking, above average activity, very friendly and welcoming on chat and in messages. If there had been a message after a week or two asking if I planned to come back to the game, and then another message a week or two later letting me know they were removing me to make room for new/active members, then I might feel differently. But the fellowship removed me and just to have an empty spot in their ranks. And just a message saying I’ve been removed, no comments or concern or anything. I know I’m being overly sensitive but these are people I’ve been chatting with for years. And things are really rough for me right now. Just feeling hurt.

Edited to add that this is the first time I have ever been gone from the game for more than a week. I have consistently been active and reliable for years.
I am so sorry this happened to you.
I've been a clan leader on other MMORPGs before, and how we figured out to handle churn and the ebb and flow of real life, folks who disappear and don't come back, and folks who disappear who you WANT to come back, is to give "what's up?" Messages over a few weeks, and if the space is really needed for another person, to let them go with a final message welcoming them back should they become active in the game again. I've brought that practice over to here.

I hope your former FS respond, and I hope you find a home with a warm(er) welcoming bunch of folks. (Which server are you on?)
 
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