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    Your Elvenar Team

Jokes Corner


There was a ZOO that had just ONE dog, nothing else. Most people thought it was a Shih Tzu.


There was a blind guy in that bar.

He asked the Bartender, "Do you want to hear a Blond Joke?"

Ummm, I'm blond, the barmaid is blond, the guy to your left is blond, and the two guys at the table behind you are blond. Are you SURE you want to tell a Blond Joke??

Nah, not if I'll have to explain it five times.


Chef - loquacious Old Dog
A Rabbi, a Priest and a Pastor were fishing. The pastor was new to the fishing site but the other two had assured him it was a good spot so they rowed out and started fishing. After a long while of not catching anything the Rabbi stood up and said, "I'm going in for a bit." He then stepped out of the boat and walked across the water to the shore. The pastor just watched, dumb struck. Before he could ask the Priest about it though, the Priest stood up and said, "me too. We'll be back in a bit." Then, he too, stepped out of the boat and walked on the water to shore. The Pastor, was again dumstruck. But after a few minutes he thought, "if they can do it, so can I!" So he stood up, took a big breath, and bravely stepped out of the boat. Only to fall into the water and nearly drown. She swims back to the boat, climbs in and tries again. With the same results. And again, and again, determined to do as his two friends had done. Meanwhile, standing on the shore, the Priest turned to the Rabbi and as they sipped their coffee, watching the poor, wet, Pastor, commented, "I knew we should have told him where the rocks are!"

Not original, of course, but still funny.


Yogi Dave

Well-Known Member
A termite walks into an ol' timey saloon and asks, "Where's the bar tender?"
Hmm, tough crowd tonight, but please save the rest of your rotten tomatoes for the following act.


Chef - loquacious Old Dog
What sign do you see most often at a boa constrictor bar?

"No Hugging"

It's a Dad Joke


Chef, Scroll-Keeper, and Buddy Fan Club Member
Shakespeare asked his buddy Jonathan Swift: "Hey, do you think we ought to invite John Milton to our dice game?"

Jonathan said, "Heck no! Whenever we invite him, there's always a pair o' dice lost!

Yogi Dave

Well-Known Member
Carl Jung sees Albert Einstein in a bar and joins him. After they talk a bit, Carl ask, "Eins stein, Einstein?"


Oh Wise One
Two married American music professors visit Beethoven's grave in Vienna.
As they stand there they can hear weird discordant music.
One of them takes out his phone and records it.
When they get back home they study it over and over and realize it is The Fifth Symphony playing backwards.
The wife asks, "What could this mean?"
The husband says, "Isn't it obvious? That is Beethoven decomposing."

Don't bother yourself.
I can see myself out.