I agree with almost everything in this thread. My take is simple. Every trade offered is the trade that person wishes to make. They may wish to make it because the system tells them the two goods are of equal value, they may wish to offer it because, at the current time they have a big need for something and are willing to pay more or less for i what their star rating, are what the traders want to do because they, at that time, feel it's in their best interest to do it. It may give them something they couldn't get any other way or at least any cheaper way, including the intangibles of feeling like they are smart, a good player, a good person or whatever. I don't begrudge anybody any trade, even when it appears to me they might be "gouging" other players. I can always ignore what I don't like.
The moral problem occurs when we mistake our irritations for moral stances. I label a certain trade as "gouging." "Gouging is bad, therefore the one offering it must be bad. I won't trade with him and I'll do all I can to insure nobody else does until he changes his ways!" This line of thinking is common with anybody, in any situation, who doesn't agree and do what you expect. And it's just as bad when you judge yourself in the same manner. You are afraid to offer 3 star trades because you might be "taken advantage of" and thus feel you were weak or stupid to have put up the trades in the first place. You accept zero star trades, but only from those who you know because, again, somebody who doesn't deserve to profit at your expense, might be profiting. The scenarios of judgement -- yourself and/or others -- are almost without limits. The key, therefore, is to refrain from judging altogether.
Here's my approach. I take all the trades I can and all my trades are at a 5% markup, minimum. I usually clear the board once a day (just under 400 discovered cities) because I get a lot of satisfaction from doing so. In other words, my goods are worth 95% of yours because I get 5% of the value in my intangible. I feel good about being able to do that and good about myself for doing so. I ignore any irritations. How I do that is in the next paragraph.
Second, when I do get irritated I think about the possible reasons for the trade's I'm seeing. One player near me consistently puts up 0 star trades. Every day, sometimes dozen. Everyone else, seeing that, might think he's trying to gouge, right? On the other hand, had they been privy to a conversation between he and I when we became neighbors, they might not be so judgemental. In that conversation I promised him I'd pick up all those zero star trades until he reached a certain size. Those trades aren't gouging or selfish, they are part of a contract I made with him! And that is the secret. When ever you come across anything that irritates you about trading, just consider you don't know the whole story. Yes, there are "gougers" but just because a person puts up a bunch of 0 star trades, day after day, doesn't mean they are one. There are many, many other reasons one might do so. At one point we were trading large amounts of silk with another fellowship. One of us would put up huge 0 star trades and the other would take them. Then we reversed and they got their goods at the same rate. The trader board doesn't tell you who is going to pick up the trade. It might be an arranged trade with a larger fellowship member. Or a friend. Or whatever. The thing is, if you are going to accuse somebody of being something moral, at least make sure you have all the facts. Almost all the time, I've found, when I feel irritated at anothers "bad" behavior, I just don't know the whole story.
Finally, on bullying. When you write rules for you fs, include them in you page, and enforce them, that's not bullying. Even if you kick somebody for "disobeying" the rules. They are dishonoring their commitments and every group has the right to disqualify their members based upon the agreement they made when they joined...unless they were forced to join, of course.
On the other hand, it is definitely bullying when you insist somebody trade your way and then follow it up with "acts of intimidation and threats of coercion." Like saying you aren't going to take their trades and are going to tell all the people you can not do do so either. In this you are trying to force your will on somebody else through "intimidation and threats of coercion." I've seen attempts to bully here and have pointed it out when I see it. The same logic applies. If you can't convince someone of your point of view and he/she insists he/she is right, you don't gather all the people in your group you can to exclude him/her from the group. That's an attempt to ostracize, a form of social bullying. And you don't continue to make snide comments about the posts he/she makes even though you "didn't read" them. And you don't, privately spread rumors, make negative claims you can't substantiate, or otherwise attempt to put down his/her reputation. All of those are a bit childish and a mild form of attempting to bully the person. Don't participate or support such behaviors. Don't do it because how can we ever stop bullying in the world when we won't take a stand against it in our own playground?
Anyway, I too liked this discussion as it was civil and carefully thought out for the most point.
AJ
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