Just when you thought it was safe to return to the forums, I have returned too... like a bad penny. (How could a penny be bad, really? I never understood that saying and I'm much too lazy to look it up. Hey, don't judge! Thats like, ten seconds, I'll never get back!)
Anyways, I have a very good reason for not updating this thread in almost a year, and a cool announcement as well! Lucky you!
I have reluctantly decided that the best way to approach this whole mess is by interviewing myself. Again. I know it's been a while but if you're as sick of the guy I am about to interview as I am, then I apologize in advance. He's such a glory hound! I can't stand him...
Week ??: Childe Ebonknight01 to the Spire of Eternity Came and crept up quiet as a mouse! I'm dreading my interview with myself, again, and hope to sneak up on me before I realize I'm there. I want to get this interview done quickly while avoiding any "pose offs" against the idiot braggart in the mirror that I am fairly certain awaits me at the top of the tower. I've lost twice in a row to him, and last time I even pulled a hammy!
Sure enough, no sooner do I arrive than I see me waiting for...me...in the mirror. Drat! I try and play it cool, and the arrogant peacock in the mirror tries too as well. What a farce! Time to get this over with.
Q1: Not that anyone cared or missed you, but why haven't you stunk up the joint...I mean, "graced these pages with your presence" over the last year?
A1: (He smiles, and I resist the urge to smack him in his smug face) Oh, that's kind of interesting actually. When I first started this thread almost two years ago, I was thinking about becoming an author, and what I wrote was a bit of a test for me, to see if people liked my writing. Well, it turns out that they did! And so... (I cut him off, he's such a windbag sometimes, I feel sorry for anyone who knows him in real life).
Q2: Yeah, yeah, no one cares. So, what, you wrote a book?
A2: I did, yes! It's called "The Ebon Knight" and it's the first installment in an urban fantasy trilogy that I wrote about two combatants on opposite sides of the eternal conflict meeting by chance and becoming allied against a new and sinister third power that has entered the fray. And actually, I wrote three books, they're all coming out within a few months of each other and... (I clear my throat loudly, which serves to stop his grating voice from...well...grating on my nerves any further).
Q3: Sounds boring and stupid.
A3: Is that even a question? (I shrug, and he shrugs back at me like he couldn't care less about my opinion. Jerk!) It's not stupid or boring, and there's a lot of intrigue, desperate combat, and perilous danger throughout. There is even romance and humor... my own quirky brand of humor, that is.
Q4: No one thinks you're funny and you wouldn't know humor if it bit you on your...err...never mind.
A4: Again, not really a question. You're horrible at this, seriously, just go find something else to do. Anyways, the eBook is up for preorder now on Amazon with a release date of 11/13/23. At that time the paperback will be available for order as well, and the audiobook shortly thereafter.
Q5: Wait. You have an audiobook coming out too? Did she do a good job, or what!
A5: She did a GREAT job, and... (he pauses, and his eyes narrow) how did you know my narrator was a female? How did you know she totally knocked it out of the park, too? (His unattractive features take on a suspicious look) Have you been spying on me?
Q6: (This is going downhill fast, so I wrack my brain for anything that might be remotely interesting to anyone... unlike anything else that has come before in this interview). Umm... how can they find your book? If someone cared to - which I doubt.
A6: Wow. Rude much? Simply put they can just go to Amazon and type in "The Ebon Knight" in the search bar and Ill pop up. Simple.
Q7: You said these forums and some of the private messages and feedback you got both in game and here really encouraged you to take the leap and become an author. Do you acknowledge Elvenar's role in helping you to get published? Say, in the acknowledgements section of your book?
A7: (For a moment, dead silence from the charlatan in the mirror greets my question) How did you know? But, yes, I did specifically thank the community of Elvenar in both of my first two books, and plan to do so again in my third book once I finish off the acknowledgements for it. I'm kind of a procrastinator at times. (I nod thoughtfully, because I am too. Not that I'm giving him an inch, though, I still think he's a slacker.)
Q8: In your acknowledgements, do you name name's, highlight specific fellowships...
A8: Alright, you know way too much about the books! Spy! Hacker! I'll see you in court!! (With that I angrily turn away from myself and stalk back down the stairs, absolutely rigid with anger. Someday I'll get that guy!)
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Hello again! Long time no see, or read, or...well, whatever. I hope you all got a chuckle or two over my zaniness, and I hope you all check out my books as they start coming out! Professional covers, editing, etc... they are the real deal. I have a website too; you can find me at authorjamesdwood.com. Thank you so much to these forums, and to the people that frequent them, you are all a great group. I'll see you in game!
Ebon